MC front end to PostgreSQL
Ray G. Miller
rgmiller at pacbell.net
Thu Dec 19 18:14:01 EST 2002
Yo troops,
With all this talk about the pleasures of working with HTML, I just
couldn't resist sending this along...
----------------------
HOW TO BUILD A WEB PAGE IN 25 STEPS
1. Download a piece of Web authoring software ~ 20 minutes.
2. Think about what you want to write on your Web page ~ 6 weeks.
3. Download the same piece of Web authoring software, because they have
released 3 new versions since the first time you downloaded it ~ 20 minutes.
4. Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on your site ~ 1 minute.
5. Visit sites to find images and awards, find 5 of them that you like ~
4 days.
6. Run setup of your Web authoring software. After it fails, download it
again ~ 25 minutes.
7. Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons to see
what they do ~ 15 minutes.
8. View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words here
and there ~ 4 hours.
9. Preview your Web page using the Web Authoring software ~ 1 minute.
10. Try to horizontally line up two related images ~ 6 hours.
11. Remove one of the images ~ 10 seconds.
12. Set the text's font color to the same color as your background,
wonder why all your text is gone ~ 4 hours.
13. Download a counter from your ISP ~ 4 minutes.
14. Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor number
16.3 E10" ~ 3 hours.
15. Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text ~ 8 hours.
16. Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your Web page on your ISP ~
40 minutes.
17. Accidentally delete your complete web page ~ 1 second.
18. Recreate your web page ~ 2 days.
19. Try to figure out how to load your Web page onto your ISP's server ~
3 weeks.
20. Call a patient friend to find out about FTP ~ 30 minutes.
21. Download FTP software ~ 10 minutes.
22. Call your friend again ~ 15 minutes.
23. Upload your web page to your ISP's server ~ 10 minutes.
24. Connect to your site on the web ~ 1 minute.
25. Repeat any and all of the previous steps ~ eternity
-------------------------------
Ain't technology wonderful?
Ray G. Miller
-----------
Turtlelips Productions
4009 Everett Ave.
Oakland, CA 94602
MailTo:rgmiller at pacbell.net
(V) 510.530.1971
(F) 510.482.3491
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